R is for Responsive Desire: The Dominant Type of Desire for Most Women

R is for Responsive Desire: The Dominant Type of Desire for Most Women

Over and over I get women that come into my office that struggle with desire. Their partner is frustrated, they are frustrated, and both often feel stuck in what to do about it. He might think “why doesn’t she want more sex?” and in search of the answer his mind often lands on things like “Is it because I’m undesirable? Is something wrong with her? Is there something wrong in our relationship?” And on the other side, she may think “I want to want to have sex with my partner” and because…

Read More

P is for Pleasure: How to Focus on Pleasure and Leave Pressure in the Dust

P is for Pleasure: How to Focus on Pleasure and Leave Pressure in the Dust

Last week we talked about the key elements of orgasm, including the body, mind, and vulnerability.  Although it is helpful to know what is needed to contribute to the potential experience of an orgasm, I want to emphasize that orgasm does not necessarily need to be the sole pleasure goal when enjoying intimacy with your partner. Instead, intimacy is about a shared pleasurable connection and the best way to do this is to expand your intimacy focus so that you have a whole array of pleasurable ways to connect that isn’t focused just on orgasm…

Read More